Baby Girl,
My sweet Ella Grace I can't believe that today marks 3 months since I delivered you from my body into your Maker's hands. I have been completely usesless today and have cried more times than I want to admit. Actually, it started yesterday. All day long I kept thinking, "Wow, I can't believe that just 3 months ago I had Ella Grace in my belly!" Time has a weird way of playing tricks like that, Baby Girl. It seems like it has only been a split second, but on the other hand it also seems like it has been an eternity since I got to be that close to you. Some days you seem so far away. The hole in my heart hasn't gotten any smaller...it is still Ella Grace sized. I suppose it always will be. Last night Daddy and I were watching "So You Think You Can Dance" (yes, I know he's such a good Daddy for putting up with me and watching that mess with me!) and I saw all the pretty girls dancing and talking about how important their moms were to them. I just sobbed thinking about you and wondering what you could have been. I know, in my heart, that you were exactly what you were "supposed" to be and that God did a perfect work in you, but in my head and in my "flesh" I sometimes can't help but mourn those dreams that I had of a little girl here on Earth and not in Heaven. Of ballerina shoes and mudpies and dolls and make up and school dances and dramatic melt downs and broken hearts and dances with your Daddy and first sleep overs and first nights away at college (A&M!) and finding your own fairly tale and walking down the aisle and having your own babies. Ella Grace I could go on for days about all the things my heart is broken over, but you know one of the things my heart is most broken over? That I will never see your smile! I will never know if you will have that precious little grin that your Daddy has. OH how it breaks my heart.
It's been 3 months and Mommy is still so sad, Baby Girl. I miss you and I love you bigger than the whole wide world! Mommy will be there as soon as she can!
Friday, June 4, 2010
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14 rose petals:
Thinking of you today.
Oh sweet friend, I made it just fine through this letter...until the last sentence. I love you more than the big wide world, as that is what my own Mother says.
Much Love to you my sweet friend. I admire you so much, as you do your earnest to find sunshine on dark days.
xxx
Andrea
thinking of you and your gorgeous girl today. i always wonder how things would have been different too. remembering your Ella, your sweet baby girl. xoxo
Sweetest Britt,
I just felt compelled to stop by once again, as I have you on my heart...be well sweet friend and know that you are being lifted up in prayer in this very moment.
Sending you love and a BIG HUG, just wish I could do more.
xoxo
ps our babies are blowing kisses from heaven, feel them?
Hugs, what a sweet letter to Ella Grace...thinking of you xxx
you are invited to follow my blog
Hugs.
Happy 3 months sweet baby girl ♥
{{{HUG}}} Thinking of you!
I am so sorry and I wish she were here physically with you.
I love that name, Ella Grace. How beautiful.
I am so sorry for the loss of your baby girl. My prayers go out to you and your husband. I hope you find solace in the days to come. Take your time and let yourself mourn for as long as you need. Your sweet girl will always be a part of you and I'm sure she's up in God's loving arms, sending sweet baby kisses down to you and shining her beautiful smile upon you.
God Bless you.
I'm not sure if my post went through. I did receive an error, so I'll try to remember my words.
I love your little girl's name, Ella Grace. How beautiful.
I am so sorry for the loss of your baby. My prayers go out to you and your husband. May you find solace in the days to come. Take all the time to grieve your sweet angel.
I know your little one is in God's heavenly arms, blowing baby kisses down to you and shining her beautiful smile upon you.
God Bless you. Take care.
The time milestones are hard for me too for some reason. Those days are very difficult.
I so very much wish you could have those smiles and other life events in person with Ella Grace. I'm so sorry for the painful days like these.
thank you for commenting on my post about miscarriage. i immediately came over here to read ella grace's story, and i'm crying now, so thanks for that. i can't even imagine the loss. thank you for sharing your thoughts at my blog, and for writing so beautifully about your daughter here at your blog. i admire your strength, and i admire your faith. someday you will have the family you were meant to have, and you will be an amazing mother.
xo
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